Over the years, I've been privileged to hang out with many wedding parties, and have noticed a few things along the way. Sometimes everything works perfectly smoothly, sometimes there is a bit of drama, and sometimes there's a bit of both. One thing can be sure though -- the bridesmaids are there to support the bride and groom (but mostly the bride!). I wrote a list of my best tips for bridesmaids as we all dive into wedding days and all that surrounds them! 1) Don’t bother the bride! If you have grudges, complaints, issues, or egos — check them at the door! Take your issue to someone else who can help. Do not burden the bride on this day. A wedding day can be stressful enough without having to worry about someone else’s problems.
2) Plan, plan, plan. Once you’ve officially be asked to be a bridesmaid, there will be lots of duties and responsibilities. And it will cost you some time and money. You’ll need to pay for your dress, you’ll need to help plan the bachelorette party and bridal shower, and you’re expected to buy the couple a gift. Plan your finances in advance and set a little aside each month if you know it will be hard to pay for many of those things at once.
3) Help the bride. Offer to get her snacks or water. Make sure she stays hydrated and that she eats a little something throughout the day! Often brides are resistant to eat or drink anything either because they’re nervous, or they’re worried about being able to use the restroom later on while wearing a huge gown. I’ve seen people pass out at weddings before, and I’d bet that she’d rather not have a dehydration hangover on the first day of her honeymoon! Don’t be pushy, but just encourage her to drink some water here and there.
4) Remember: this is not your day — it’s THEIR day. Yes, you want to look nice and not do anything to sabotage the bride and groom’s photos or vision, but ultimately the bride’s wants and needs far exceed your own (at least on this day!). If she needs a piece of hair curled that fell out of place and it’s time to walk out the door — hers is getting fixed and yours is not. If the spare bobby pin you were getting ready to use is desperately needed by the bride — it’s hers. If someone needs to run and grab something she needs from the car — do it for her. Let her enjoy the day and take any possible burdens off her that you can. Plus there are a group of you! Put your heads together and work as a team to ensure that she has no distractions and doesn’t have to deal with any last-minute problems.
5) Cooperate! The best thing you can do all day is listen when the wedding party is getting instructions. These could be from the wedding planner, the church coordinator, the photographer, parents, the DJ, etc. It’s ok to have fun and be relaxed, but if you pay attention during those times, the day will flow smoothly and leave more time for partying!